A good weather is really precious during the seasons of winter and spring, and there seem to be no guaranteed "spring" day! So when the sky is clear and the temperature outside if above 60 farenheit, everyone comes out to PLAY!
It was just too beautiful a day to stay in doors, so i decided to go study on a big grass slope in school. There was no one but me, and another woman. It was a little chilly in the morning at 11am, but whenever the clouds bypass the sun, and the sun's rays touched my skin, it was like moments of summer!
Oh and while i was reading my notes on the hill, there was this guy who rolled down the slope, and I mean all the way down! At first I thought it was a group of daredeveils, but no! He was on his own. Well, I thought, ok, another weird guy. Then he rolled down the slope AGAIN! I looked up the slope to see how the women reacted and she packed up and left! Ok, so do i leave too? I decided to just stay, and he left, so everything was back to normal. So there was I, reading on the hill with the beautiful view of downtown troy, lying down on the grass to take breaks once in a while.....
THEN! When I decided to take a snack break, there he was standing about a metre away from me, and he was waving and saying "hi" at me. I forced out a natural smile, and HIed back.
Rolling guy: "What are you reading?"
Me: Showed him the cover of the book instead of replying, and pretend i was busy reading.
Rolling guy: Oh I have never read that book! Is it for class?
Me: erm yah (and then went back to READING my book)
Rolling guy: Ok, nice day! (and he walked ALL THE WAY to the other side of the grass patch)
My goodness! I have never been approached by such a weird person before. And he's expression when he waved at me almost freaked me out on the spot! Honestly, I feel bad for acting quite cold toward him, but at that moment I just felt that it wouldn't have been too wise to engage him in a cconversation. Well, that's the end of this rolling guy......
I read for a little while longer and decided to go cycling (borrowed Steph's bike). It was the first time I seriously cycled since I came to Troy. I decided to cycle to downtown Troy, which was down the slope form RPI. I really over-estimated my cycling fitness. I went DOWNTOWN in a breeze but struggled coming back UPTOWN!
At a traffic light, a black American guy that looked a little sloppy came up to me and said something like "it's not really save to cycle here, some people just can't "see" the road". Judgeing from his appearance and remembering advice to be wary of black people, I nodded with a tinge of nonchalance yet courtesy to his kind gesture. Then he went on the ask "you ok with crossing the road yourself?" I went like "yah" immediately with quick nods because I was really starting to feel suspicious. But he just walked on and said "just be safe ok!" and ran across the road.
That was when I realized that he really meant no harm, and I simply let my stereotypiccal bias towards black people get the better of me. Well, I definitely have to protect myself and remain caution. But I can't help but think that, this man was really just showing some concern. In fact, I think he sensed my apprehension and decided to run across the road instead of waiting for the traffic light. To know that he even showed consideration toward me when he totally could just "heck it" to what I felt, just made me feel worse. I probably judged him the way many white people have judged him. That he look poor and he's black, so he's dangerous.
Being in the normal crowd in Singapore, makes it really hard to understand how it feels to be discriminated. I feel sad even when people misunderstand my intentions, much less if they misunderstand my character! I just hope that this man, if he really is kind at heart, will not be discouraged by how the world judge him. It's really sad how people get so disappointed with being so misunderstood that they give up on anything good in them. If I could talk ot him, I would probably refer him to a quote in Mitch Albom's "Tuesdays with Morrie"- "If your culture don't work for you, don't buy it".
It's so easy for us to judge, but it's so painful for the one who is judged. Maybe if we can really differentiate discerning from being judgemental, we can learn to treat each other with more respect.
Another small life lesson!
Thanks to our friend Steph, who told us about a nice spot to watch the sunset, Valerie, Daphne and I ended our day with a beautiful view of the sun setting on the downtown Troy. It was actually at the same slope I was at and the VERY same SPOT! It was beautiful......we even saw the going out of sight behind the Troy buildings.
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