WORKshops finally begins

Finally the workshops for my internship began!

I only found out today that it was us, the group of students who are conducting the workshop. I met the interns who were paid to work for this professor as I was only there to help-the workshop under my professor starts only next week.

I'll be working in the workshops for what they call Boys and Girls club, which functions like a day care centre for needy families in the neighbourhood (mostly blacks). This one that I went today is in Albany while he one under my professor is in Troy. The clubs serve allow parents to leave their children, and off the streets, when they go for work in the day. If you could see for yourself the kinds people on the streets, you would be able to understand why these centres are hope for the children. Like all welfare organizations, this centre on a tight budget and there weren't professionals to conduct classes, only volunteers and voluntarily trained counsellors-who were really just facilitators-cum-discipline masters.

The other interns for the workshop were unprepared in the sense that there really wasn't any lesson plan, apart from and outline that says introduction of program and them exploring the software, or materials to supplement the workshop. Although the software was self-explanatory, given that the students there belonged to needy black families, they were more restless and unmotivated to learn mathematics than normal. The workshop started off with the children looking restless but as Jesse, our leader, started asking them questions and relating what we were doing to everyday life, they children started answering questions and looked more alert.

So it ended of not too badly for the day!

I realized that when it came to mathematics, their foundation was fairly weak, and needed individual attention and guidance. I was able to attend to one of them to teach them about cartesian coordinates, but there were some others who just explored the software aimlessly. And it is really such a pity, because I could see that if they receive more attention, they were willing to think and try. But without guidance, they tend to get restless and eventually not benefit from whatever materials they had in front of them. Still, I see hope for them at the centre, much more than if they are left at home or to wander on the streets.

After the one hour workshop, the rest of the group left while i spoke to the in-charge. I wanted to volunteer to work at the centre on the days that i was free. Since I was there, I felt I should make full use of my time, apart from preparing for FYP. I did think about it previously, but after today, I felt a greater urge to participate more. It's really surprising, because I never felt such a strong need to volunteer. Maybe because it's to do with children, and I see for myself how much potential these kids have if more people could give them attention. Personal, I feel that children are really the ones that deserve all the attention and concern in the world!

After talking to the in-charge, i was about the leave the centre when i saw two boys, about 11 or 12 shooting balls in the centre's indoor basketball court- one of them was in the workshop earlier. I asked if i could join him and i starting shooting too. He was surprisingly welcoming and friendly and we had such a great time even though it's just shooting balls. He even corrected my shooting by asking me to jump more when i made a shot, and i really did better with his advise-he himself proclaimed that he TAUGHT me to get better. He was a great kid, always remembering to take turns, and even gave me extra shots when i almost nailed my 3-pointers. Oh his name is Nicolas, he was an african american, chubby and bubbly!It really brighten my day to know him.

I feel really thankful that I was led to this volunteer experience as i have a feeling that I might have opened a door into the world that belongs to the african americans. It might be only a glimpse to what their life is really like, but it already is a priviledge! Well, I've seen them on the streets and maybe greeted some bus drivers or cashiers, but never engaging them any further. By volunteering here, I may be able to get to know some kids and what difficulties such welfare organizations face, apart from the shortage of volunteers and funds. I know that things might not be all optimistic all the time, but I am prepared to go for this experience and take away as much of it when I leave this place.

I'm really looking forward to the next time i see them! Wish me luck guys!

e-notebk

Today I just spoke to Bernice and she read my blog! I thought that no one believe that I update my blog anymore. I was just browsing through the previous entries and i realized each time i was rushing through so much that I my sentences seem neverending, and sometimes i didn't know what I was typing! Sorry about that you people who are still staying tuned....I'll slow down and type more coherantly.

Just a short comment....I realize that blogging shouldn't have to be so "wholesome" like there's something interesting to talk about. It can also be like a e-notebook, to "finger down" small thoughts and comments!

Summer in Rhode island

Haha been a while since I blogged....when i get things to do, blogging just becomes something I pretend to forget about doing.

I'm in Rhode Island now, at my jiejie's place. Since I was only doing computer work for my internship, I decided to spend a few days here and help out with the garden. It's been a new experience for me, helping out with picking the peas, harvesting zuichinni and summer squash under the hot summer sun! I've always wanted to work in an orchard or plantation and this has KIND OF fulfill my little wish. It's not a big garden but we get to harvest and sell some veggies everyday.

Apart from the the different types of veggies, I think I've seen at least 20 types of insects in this small garden. On top of that, Jiejie's obsession with flowers added another flower garden to her yard this year!

This place is bursting with plantlife! It's really calming to start the day waking up to a beautiful flower garden, walk amongst the greens, feel the gentle morning sun. I've been doing that for the past 5 days and every morning, after breakfast, I would cycle to URI (University of Rhode Island), where I go to the public library to do my studying and computer work.

Oh and I have been "running" a dog called maxi for a little part time pay. He's really hyper-active, and I get to do a little extra running when i'm suppose to be walking him around the yard. He's quite mischievous, always trying to incite Buddy (Paul's dog), who is mostly chained since no one's free to walk him. I managed to "run" him too these few days, and I could see how much he liked it!

I actually like Buddy better, I' more of a large dog person. Sall dogs just seem to be always looking out for fun and attention and too hyperactive for me. Larger dogs seems to be more affectionate and "friend-like". There's just this air of loyalty to the makes people feel that they can really bond with them, and not just have the for pets.

Oh and the woods here is full of wildlife too! Jsut the other day when I went jogging, I saw a few squirrels, chipmunks, a fox, a wild rabit and 5 species of birds which I don't now the names of.

There are actually possoms and deers here too, I wonder if i'll get to see them...Ill be trying to get photos of chipmunks and wild rabbits..wish me luck!

I really feel at home here. I have a bike for my use, a room with TV and cable in it, and a storeroom full of food!! Most importantly, I have family here. People that I watch TV with, eat dinner with, and go get bubble tea or buy dinner with! It's just sad that I'm going back to Troy in 5 days. Well, but i can't slack forever, and I'm quite excited about internship too!

I cannot be praised- not even from myself

I forgot to add in some photos of my new room in the apt.

Just after feeling good that I seem to have some talent in mechanics, I almost burnt the apartment down yesterday morning!

This is the photo of the island we put together on sunday.


I actually left the stove on and went to sleep. The bottom of the pot actually melted and dripped into the stove. Actually it almost looked like a sculpture piece and the metal collected nicely into a pool. Ok, that's still no excuse for that almost grave mistake!

Why shold it be handyMAN?

I'm beginning to feel good about my decision to stay on in Troy instead of going over to rhode island before the workshop for my internship starts. I think my housemates and I are learning to trust each other and learn about each other.

Yesterday night when Jay came to stay over, we also watch Jurassic Park, but a silly version with people talking at the background mocking the lines by the characters and also about the movie. now I know why America has an irking binge drinking problem among the youth. Even watching a movie and playing games they can leisurely finish a dozen bottles of beer, between 2 guys! And they drink it like it was orange juice or something. they even drink so much soda at one go. I didn't join in, cos I don't like beer and I better not grow the habit.

Oh and today, the landlord brought us a new Island and a sleeping couch that has a foldable bed. The island came in the wooden planks and screws and we had to assemble them. And......I found that I'm quite good with assembling parts. Maybe it has been an interest that I long forgotten. I remember when I was young, I was always interested in watching how my father fixed the household appliance, and how my uncles put the furnitures together. They never let me try out because all the was simply TOO COMPLICATED for a little GIRL. I guess I kinda forgot how I sometimes wanted to breakdown a remote control into it's parts and see if i could fix it again. Haha, another masculine side of me revealed!!

One thing's for sure, the guys would not expect me to know much about fixing things, I could hear it from Matt's tone when he said "don't worry, Jay and I will figure this out". I bet he never would expect to say "I think she's right" when I spotted the mistake and solved their problems a few times. But I did find it weird why they couldn't figure out what I resolved when they are engineering students......hm...i'm sure i'm not that good, I wonder if it's just them...

Tomorrow I am going to start following my study schedule...wish me luck!!!

Getting comfortable here!

Today Jay, my classmate whom I thought was going to stay in this apt came over. He is actually a long-time buddy of Matt's. All of us went to the movies at Colonie Centre (shopping mall) and we watched "A-team". It was quite a cool action movie......quite funny too!

You know at first I was thinking maybe I should just stay in the apt and do my stuff instead of going with them. Then I remembered when I went to NYC myself, if that morning I didn't go travelling with the people I met in the hostel, i wouldn't have made new friends and had that great experience travelling with them and learning from them! Although watching a movie will definitely pale in terms of adventure and learning, it gave me and the guys something to remember and talk about. And I find that I am getting more comfortable around them.

Today I found out that Jeff is really the blur, nerdy kinda guy. I won't be surprised if he's the kind that bullys like to pick on. But that's just the way he is, and he's being himself-which I respect. Too many people in our Singaporean society find the need to wear a sociable, confident mask, even though deep down they feel insecure about who they are. Since I came to the US for GIP, I've seen people of sooo many different personality types that I feel in singapore our personality variation curve is only half or something. But one thing that they all have in common is that, they are jsut themselves, they don't seem to hide it. Even if they are nerdy, they seem to just go with it and heck what people say. This I truly admire, because I recall that sometimes I find it hard to be myself and in the end I don't even know if an opinion or action is really me anymore. In the end, it's the people who really cares that don't care about how perfect you are, and those who don't that picks on your flaws. So why bother about the selfish scrutinizing and superficial judgement of these people? Easier said than done, this I still need to learn.

Today I planned out a schedule for my independent studies since I will be practically only doing computer work until July when the workshop starts. I suddenly realize I have so much time to myself, I really should not waste it. I hope I really bring back something more from this internship period back with me. One of it, I do hope I can bring back a friendship with my housemates, cause I feel that they are really great people in their own way!

My housemates

Today's the 3rd day I'm at my new apartment. I'm beginning to feel good about staying here......Perhaps me freaking out on the first day is God's will, so that when I realize how wrong I was, I would feel so much more assured that I was led here in safe hands!

From what i've gathered, both of them are the more studious kinda engineering guys. Maybe Jeff is a bit more nerdy since he comes across a little essentric and inflexible. He's also quite and all-rounded gamer! He has his Xbox, playstation, and Wee outside in the living room, and inside his room he has his desktop equipped with everything he needs for online gaming. But he's not a hardcore gamer, he watch videos too. Yesterday I could hear him laughing out loud from my room and when i walked pass his room, he was watching some comedy on his computer. He's kinda adorable in his innocent way like a child. He's not so much of an initiator when it comes to helping, but he helps out whenever it seemed obvious that his help is needed. I guess he's just not that sensitive a person, but from what i've seen, definitely not a bad one. Although he's an engineer, he didn't seem good with math when we were dividing the cost for grocery shoping yesterday, as there were many stuff we bought that i will not be using, so grocery was a little more complicated.

Matt don't seem like a nerd to me, more like a dilligent and intelligent worker with little words. He does speak with more EQ and doesn't have that essentric aura that nerds have. He's also not the wild guy with the taleban terrorist aura....as what i saw on his facebook before meeting them. His facebook was the one that freaked my out so much I seriously tried to persuade my landlord to let me move out of this apartment. I'm glad I took the chance and stayed on to meet them first. He's the one that people can talk to and not feel awkward, and he offered to give me lift whenever I need to go around since I don't drive here. Surprisingly, Matt is quite a neat person and lives quite a healthy lifestyle. Most of the organic and non-processed groceries are brought by him-granola bars, wheat biscuits, orange juice, chicken breast meat instead of thighs, organic rice etc. Jeff is the typical american student that likes processed frozen food and sodas and ice-creams- but he says he's trying to eat healthy (he bought a box of ice-cream bars yesterday..no comments). And Matt sleeps early, at 11pm his lights go out..for the past 2 nights.

Woo......I realized I've been quite observant to list all these out for the past 2 days! Oh and we had dinner together last night. I prepared something that is more western than chinese even though they told me they do take chinese food- I just didn't know if true healthy chinese food will be to thier liking. They seemed to like the food I prepared since all the mushroom chicken was finished...except that Jeff ate all the chicken and left the mushrooms-apparently he doesn't like mushrooms. Matt doesn't like pork- lucky he said he doesn't LIKE and not he don't EAT, if not my concern about him being a muslim terrorist will arise again. We bought pork chop in the end since Matt said he would give pork a chance again.

After dinner, we went grocery shopping together, and it was Sam's Club!!! My favourite grocery store, cause everything comes in bulk....like a food warehouse. I was glad that I could offer my membership card so they could enjoy the benefit. Now is really the testing time when each of us are trying to check out what kind of a person we each are, and whether we are the contributors or the leechers. I found out that the 2 of them are definitely not leechers, and I am more then willing to contribute as much within my ability to maintain a good housemate relationship.

So far things seem pretty good, and I even chose to stay here to do my independent studies before the workshop for my internship starts, instead of going over to stay at Rose's place.

Thank God my housemates are not weirdos or crazy party people!

Post-trip, pre-internship, meet- the-housemates

I am now at the new apartment alone. My 2 housemates are out to work in their internship and I will only see them for the first time tonight when they are back at about 630pm.

I know this entry should be about how wonderful travelling had been, but I just am not in the mood to talk about it yet. Maybe because today marks the first day that I spend in Troy alone, and on top of that, I do not know what to expect from my housemates. This brings me back to the start of GIP, I can't really remember how I felt on the first day, but there wasn't anything so significantly sad that I remember it. But now I really feel fear deep inside and i'm worried that it will slowly grow to such an intensity that I can't avoid it.

After touching down at 930 this morning, I spent the day reactivating my US number (cos I lost it in Vancouver), and coming back to unpack my stuff. I found that I was kind of battling with my own voice inside my head, crying out that I am really alone now, no Singaporeans around me, and it will be like that for 2 months. I have to admit that for the whole day I have been avoiding thinking about it, because I know that coming to terms with it would require some emo-ing and maybe tears again. I guess it's not only that I will be alone here that scares me, but living with 2 American guys. I really don't know if i can get along with them, and I totally do not know what ot expect. If living here would be just living apart as housemates and not even friends, the 2 months will be enduring! Well, ironically, this is something that I have been wanting to experience.

Was chatting with friend online just now, trying to distract myself from my own thoughts, and my housemates came back from work! They seem like nice people. But people usually appear nice at first and time slowly reveals OTHER things. I just hope it's good things.....

I feel much better now after I have met them. We are all back in our own rooms doing our stuff. It's better this way for a first day......too much forced socialization will only make things awkward.

I'll be uploading my photos from the trip soon! Tomorrow starts the internship.....excited and also anxious if I can be of help to the research team....gambatte!